


When We Live Such Fragile Lives

by lukey_irwie



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hockey, Fluff and Angst, Forbidden Love, I'm just starting this fic man I don't have much to tag, Idk I think that's all, Junior Hockey, M/M, also michael b jordan will be reffered to as mike, and a bunch of other songs, and everyone is Canadian but ashton (and pheobe/hayley), and theyre a good band, but i really wanted michael b jordan to be in this too and i didnt want to change his name, i couldn't write a hockey fic and not have it take place in canada, i kinda wanna make a playlist for this, idk im excited for this and a lot of songs could fit it, ik it'll get confusing, in fact dirty little secret as a whole kind of fits this song, it fits okay, just try to remember that okay, michael clifford will be michael, that goes against everything i stand for as a canadian, this takes place in toronto btw, which is why i need to get spotify, yes the title is from a 'the all american rejects song'
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-20
Updated: 2015-08-14
Packaged: 2018-03-18 19:39:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3581514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lukey_irwie/pseuds/lukey_irwie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Luke Hemmings is an upcoming hockey star. With all the media pressure on him he has to hide his sexuality and he thinks he's doing a pretty good a job at it. Or at least until Ashton Irwin comes along. Ashton is also an upcoming star and the media loves to pit Ashton and Luke against each other and create a rivalry between them, the fact that Ashton plays for Luke's rival team only adds to that. Luke's supposed to hate Ashton, but hating Ashton is the last thing Luke could ever do.</p><p>Or the one where Luke and Ashton are star players on rival hockey teams and have a forbidden relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my lashton hockey au that I'm super excited for, as you can tell from the tags it takes place in Canada and just read the tags to avoid confusion. It's easier than retyping.

_Secrets._  We all have them, but have you ever had one that could destroy your life?

Like really, actually,  _destroy it._  Not just embarrass you or make your high school experience shitty, but one that could destroy you and everything you've built for your life?

Well Luke Hemmings has one, well two really, but they're interconnected. You see Luke is gay and he happens to have a crush on a guy.

Now you're probably thinking; yeah, his sexuality would make his life more difficult as not everyone is accepting, but it couldn't destroy it.

_Except it can._

Because Luke is no ordinary teenager, he happens to be an exceptionally talented hockey player and has been compared to players such as Sidney Crosby and Steven Stamkos.

It's been a debate for a long time whether or not gays should be allowed to play in professional sports and while many people think they should, nothing has been done to change that so far.

From pressure from his teammates to hook up with girls and 'not be such a prude' to having to turn down the multiple girls who throw themselves at him, politely of course so he can't get any negative press about it, Luke is having enough trouble just hiding his sexuality.

But the guy Luke happens to have a crush on? Well that's disastrous enough on it's own, even if Luke was out and accepted it would still be risky to like this guy.

Because Luke is supposed to hate this guy, but Luke could do anything but hate him.

His name's Ashton Irwin, he's Australian and happens to be the best hockey player to come out of Australia,  _ever._

Now you might be thinking that's not a big deal, no one ever hears of Australians doing well in hockey, or any winter sport for that matter. In fact wasn't Australia's only gold medal in the Winter Olympics because everyone in front of the Australian happened to trip? Surely being the greatest Australian hockey player isn't much to live up to and you wouldn't have to be very great to be labeled the best player.

Except Ashton is good,  _really good_ , in fact his points are close to Luke's.

And ever since Luke and Ashton were discovered as players the media has pitted them against each other. And the fact that Ashton happened to be transferred to a Canadian league to truly reach his potential and happened to be put on Luke's rival team only makes it worse.

They're supposed to be rivals, they're supposed to compete against each other,  _hate each other_   _even_.The media wants it, the fans want it, their coaches want it, their teammates want it,  _everyone wants it._

But what if Luke and Ashton happen to do the just the opposite of that? What if they happened to fall in love?

_What would happen then?_


	2. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Calum throws a season kick off party and even though Luke hides in the kitchen the whole time the night is still rather eventful.  
> Sadly no Ashton is in this yet though, just enjoy the drunk Luke.

"Luke, people are gonna be here soon, stop sulking. I'm finally hosting the season kick off party and you're not going to ruin it" Calum says.

"I'm not sulking" Luke protests.

Okay maybe he is, but Luke isn't going to admit that. And he feels bad for not being very excited as he knows how much this party means to Calum but Luke's just not looking forward to all the pressures that come with partying.

Like the pressure to act straight, which Luke will admit he doesn't do a very good job at. Usually he'll just hide in the kitchen and play cards or something with the quieter kids, which Luke actually quite enjoys.

The 'nerds' as Jackson, Luke's teammate, who can either be the nicest person ever or a huge bonehead, likes to call them are actually quite nice. They don't pressure Luke into doing things he doesn't want to. And they don't freak out over Luke and treat him like some celebrity just because he happens to be so good at hockey. They just treat him like the same kid they've been going to school with for the past twelve years and Luke is grateful for that.

Ever since Luke started getting attention from the media and they compared him to great players such as Sidney Crosby or Steven Stamkos, which Luke really doesn't think he's even close to being as good as those players, people at school have started treating him like a celebrity.

Teachers have tried to give Luke advantages in school, like not having to do certain tests or essays, which of course Luke always turns down as it's not fair at all to the other students. People who used to tease Luke, now kiss up to him and girls practically throw themselves at Luke. And Luke is running out of excuses to tell those girls as to why he doesn't want to be with them.

Luke knows it's only a matter of time before people become suspicious and Luke should probably take more drastic measures, like getting a fake girlfriend or something, but it's not like that's really an option for Luke. With playing hockey almost his entire life and having his life revolve around the game to being slightly shy and awkward Luke's only friends are his teammates, and 'the nerds', Luke supposes, if they consider him their friends. Luke doesn't really have any girl friends, so it's not like he could ask anyone to pretend to be his fake girlfriend and he's not going to lead girls on and act like he likes them just for the sake of looking straight, that's a totally douchey thing to do.

Not to mention the thought of just kissing girls makes Luke really uncmfortable. Luke knows he's not sexually attracted to girls so why would he put himself through something he doesn't like? Besides no ones gotten suspicious yet, so Luke isn't going to change anything unless he has to.

"You've been lying on my couch ever since we finished setting up and you've barely spoken. I don't know about you, but I'd call that sulking. Aren't you excited for the party and the new season? Usually you can't shut up before the season starts, or anytime we aren't playing hockey" Calum says, snapping Luke out of his thoughts "and now you're zoning out on me, great, I can really feel the love today."

"Sorry Cal, I've just got a lot on my mind" Luke apologizes, and pretends like he doesn't hear Calum grumble 'when do you not'.

Sometimes Luke wants to tell Calum what's on his mind, Calum's his best friend and Luke knows keeping secrets from Calum is putting a strain on their friendship but it's just too risky to tell Calum. Not that Luke expects Calum to go blurting out his secret to the world or judge him for being gay, Luke knows Calum would never do that.

But what if Calum accidentally blurts it out? Like when Jackson is pressuring Luke to dance with a girl or judging him for not 'pursuing' any of the girls who show interest in him, what if Calum gets angry and blurts it out? Calum often speaks without thinking, especially when he's angry. It's just too risky for anyone on Luke's team, even Calum to know his secret.

"Of course I'm excited for the new season, you know I am" Luke says "just not the party"

"Oh, well fuck you too, you know you're being a real asshole today, Luke. You know how much hosting this means to me" Calum grumbles.

"I know and I'm excited for _you_ just not the whole party aspect of it" Luke says.

"Why not? Beer and hot girls, not to mention my amazing playlist. What part of that isn't exciting?" Calum asks.

 _The girls_ , Luke thinks to himself but doesn't say anything, of course.

"I don't know I'm just into that I guess, and I'm not looking forward to Jackson pressuring me to hook up with someone" Luke says.

"Well tell him to go fuck himself, you're obviously not into random hookups and he needs to accept that" Calum says.

"Don't you think I would if I could? You know how easily offended Jackson's ego gets. He wouldn't hesitate to punch me if I said something like that to him and you know I'm not good at fighting" Luke says.

"Oh trust me, I know, remember that time I saved your life when that guy tried to fight you in Ottawa last year?" Calum jokes.

"God don't remind me, I'm trying to block that from my mind. You didn't have to save me, I would've been find on my own" Luke grumbles.

"You and I both know you wouldn't've. You would've gotten a concussion at the least and we can't have our little star player getting hurt, now can we?" Calum coos getting up from his spot on the recliner and walking over to the couch to ruffle Luke's hair.

"God you're worse than my mum" Luke groans.

"Well I take that as a compliment" Calum retorts.

Luke is about to reply with something sarcastic but the doorbell rings making both boys jump and Luke knocks his forehead on Calum's.

"Ow!" Calum groans rubbing his forehead.

"Well maybe if you weren't invading my personal space that wouldn't've happened" Luke retorts.

"Well I can't help it, you're just so... hot and intriguing" Calum says dreamily before pretending to faint, almost knocking his head off the coffee table in the process.

"Jeez, be careful!" Luke exclaims worriedly and sits up quickly.

"Who's the mum now?" Calum retorts.

"Well I was only worried because if you were unconscious I would have to greet the guests myself, I'd actually quite like you to hit your head off the table" Luke retorts.

"Yeah well so would I" Calum says and then realizes the error in his statement "I'd want you to hit your head off a table, that is".

"No you wouldn't, you love me too much" Luke retorts.

"You wish" Calum scoffs before sticking his arms out "now help me up".

"No, you're the one who decided to throw yourself against the ground, you're own your own" Luke says getting up and going to walk past Calum.

"Fine then I'll just stay here and you can greet the guests and host the party" Calum says as there's another knock on the door.

"You know I really hate you sometimes" Luke grumbles while helping Calum up.

"Aww I love you too, babe" Calum coos ruffling Luke's hair.

"Can you stop messing with my hair?" Luke grumbles trying to fix his hair in the mirror.

"God you're such a diva, Luke" Calum says " keep it like that, it looks like you made out with someone.

"The only person I've been with today is you and everyone knows that so" Luke says.

"Then people will think we're in gay relationship, no biggie" Calum jokes.

 _If only it was that easy_ , Luke thinks to himself.

"Now you'd better actually socialize, Luke, I don't want people to think my parties are boring because of you" Calum says.

"I'm sure people will be too drunk and too busy eating each other's faces off to realize if your party is boring, but if they do it'll be because of you, not me" Luke says.

"You know I'm not going to forget you being mean to me, Hemmings, and you will pay for this later" Calum grumbles before swinging the door open to reveal their teammate Grant.

Grant raises his eyebrows at Luke's hair before looking between him and Calum and raising his hands in the air.

"It's not my place to comment" Grant says and Luke can't help but feel reassured a little.

At least he knows Grant wouldn't judge him for being gay, not that Luke would ever tell him.

"You know what is my place to comment though?" Grant says "on Hood's terrible hosting services, it took you seven minutes to answer the door and you don't even have any music playing? How did Jackson let you host again?"

He's not saying it rudely however, just poking fun. Grant is probably one of Luke's favourite teammates, he's just so nice and easy going and isn't judgemental at all. He also doesn't try and pressure Luke into anything and usually defends Luke when Jackson is acting like a dick.

Grant's also quite attractive, he's pretty tall, although he's still about two inches shorter than Luke, Luke's height is a curse although it does have an advantage in hockey, and his dark hair compliments his blue eyes well. Luke may have had a huge crush on Grant at one point, but no one needs to know that.

"Fuck you, Gustin" Calum grumbles going over to his iPod dock " I just hadn't got to that yet, but be prepared to be blown away by my amazing playlists.

"Is there a lot of Hannah Montana on that?" Grant whispers to Luke.

"I don't know, he wouldn't let me listen but probably and a lot of Justin Bieber too" Luke whispers back causing Grant to laugh.

"What are you two whispering about?" Calum asks suspiciously.

"How much of a loser you are" Luke says.

"I think you mean how much of winner I am" Calum says.

"No, no we don't and that joke you just made proves it" Grant says causing Luke to laugh.

"Wow, I can tell when I'm being replaced" Calum grumbles.

Grant opens his mouth to say something but the door bursts open and Jackson barges in, with some random girl next to him.

"Let's get this fucking party started" Jackson bellows causing the girl next him to flinch.

It's quite obvious Jackson is drunk already and by the annoyed look on the girl's face she probably had to drive him.

"Don't think I'm with him" the girl says "he's just my neighbour and I had to make sure he wouldn't do anything stupid."

"Well good, you're too pretty for him anyways" Calum says causing Luke and Grant to groan "I'm Calum, but you can call me Cal"

"I'm Ashley, and you were cute until you opened your mouth" the girl, Ashley says, causing Luke and Grant to laugh.

\---  
It's not long until Calum's house is filled with grinding couples and the smell of alcohol and it's not long before Luke hides in the kitchen to play cards.

There's two boys named Hughbert and Milton, a girl named Daphne, and the Goalie for Luke's team, Nat, playing cards with Luke. There's also a boy named Connor, who happens to be Luke's ex.

It wasn't a terrible break up or anything, Luke just felt bad having to keep their relationship a secret, especially since Connor was out and Luke knew he probably didn't want to hide again. And they both felt it was too risky for them to be in a relationship and Connor would've felt horrible if they were caught and Luke was outed because of him.

They're still really good friends though, which Luke is glad for because he likes Connor and didn't want things to end up bad between them. Plus it means Luke actually has someone to talk to about his sexuality that he knows won't tell anyone. Luke doesn't know how he'd handle everything without Connor.

Sure Luke's brothers and parents know about his sexuality but none of them are gay themselves so they don't understand like Connor does.

Last time Luke saw Calum he was making out without Ashley and Luke takes a huge gulp of his beer as he has flashbacks of it. Luke's glad for Calum of course and Ashley seemed pretty cool and Luke wouldn't mind if she ended up being something more than a one night stand for Calum, but Luke still didn't need to see that. Grant, along with a couple of other of Luke's teammates are making sure Jackson doesn't get into too much trouble and Luke figures the others are either with girls or drukenly dancing.

Luke doesn't really care though, he's perfectly content playing cards, and not just because he's winning.

"God, do you have to be good at everything, Hemmings" Nat, who's in last place grumbles.

"Well I'm not good at goalkeeping, which is why you're our goalie and the best in the league" Luke says.

"That's not gonna work on me Hemmings, although I do know I'm the best goalie" Nat retorts, causing Luke to roll his eyes.

Luke's about to say something but he's interrupted by the door bursting open, and to no surprise, it's Jackson.

"Hemmings! Wolff! What are you doing with the nerds?! Get out there and have some fun!" Jackson bellows "c'mon, you can't be virgins forever!"

"Go home Whittemore, you're drunk" Nat sighs.

"No, you go home! If you're gonna be so boring you g-" Jackson says but is cut off by Grant and Stiles coming in.

"You know what, that's a great idea, Nat" Grant says "you should go home, Jackson."

"You can't force me!" Jackson exclaims.

"I'm sure we could get the whole team and everyone else at this party to agree with us as you're being annoying and embarrassing yourself, now c'mon" Grant says.

"You think I'm annoying?" Jackson asks, and he isn't angry and actually shows vulnerability that he rarely displays.

"No, I never said  _you_  were annoying, you were just being annoying, there's a difference" Grant says, obviously feeling bad for hurting Jackson, "now c'mon, we all know this isn't the real you and we don't need people thinking it is"

"Can I come with you guys too?" Nat asks "this is getting boring anyways"

"He just doesn't wanna lose to me,  _again_ " Luke says.

"Well I'm not surprised Wolff is losing, he's not very smart" Stiles teases.

"Hey!" Nat exclaims.

"Do you want a ride too, Luke?" Grant asks.

"No, but thanks" Luke says "I'm actually having fun here and I think Calum wants me to help clean after anyways"

"Okay, well, I'll be coming back anyways so let me know if you change your mind" Grant says.

"Okay I will, thanks Grant" Luke says.

"It's no problem, see ya Hemmings" Grant says.

Stiles and Nat also say goodbye before leaving with Grant and Jackson.

\---  
Luke ends up winning the game were playing when Nat left but only won one more out of the ten they played after that. Luke doesn't know why, but ever since Nat left, although Luke has a feeling it had more to do with Jackson, he's felt really upset.

Maybe it has to do with the fact that Calum ditched him and didn't even play one game with them like he normally does.Perhaps it's because Grant, Stiles and Nat, the three teammates Luke trusts the most, besides Calum, have left. Maybe it's because he meets Connor's eyes every time he looks up. Luke doesn't know why, but ever since he was left alone with three people he barely knows and Connor, he's felt really vulnerable.

Luke feels like everyone somehow knows his secret and is judging him. He knows it's irrational because he's hidden from everyone but four people and three of those people don't even know his secret and have been with him the whole night anyways, so it's not like they could've done anything. And while Connor knows, Luke knows he would never tell anyone. Luke knows the worry is irrational, but he can't get rid of it, no matter how much he drinks.

Luke finishes what at least must be his tenth beer, he doesn't really know or care, and reaches into the cooler for another one but Connor gets up quickly to stop him.

"No, Luke" Connor says grabbing Luke's arm "you've already had too much and I'm worried"

"But I'm fine, really" Luke says ignoring the way his head is pounding and his heart is racing.

Now that Luke thinks about it it could be due to the alcohol, although he just figured it was anxiety.

"You're shaking, Luke" Connor says worriedly looking down at Luke's hand "c'mon, I'm taking you back to my place".

"But Calum" Luke protests.

"He'll understand" Connor says, "and I'll let Grant know too, but you need to get out of here"

"Okay" Luke says trying to stand and instantly feeling dizzy when he does.

"Careful, careful" Connor says wrapping his arms around Luke to steady him.

Connor says goodbye to Hughbert, Milton and Daphne before leading Luke to his car.

Connor opens the passenger door for Luke and Luke thanks him before getting in and watches as Connor goes around to get in the drivers seat.

Luke can't help but blush as it reminds him of one of their dates, although of course Luke wasn't drunk on one of their dates, Connor just held the door to be a cute boyfriend.

Luke sometimes wishes he could go back to dating Connor. It was kind of fun going on secret dates and it was nice to have someone to kiss and cuddle. Although Luke knows they broke up for a reason and if wouldn't be fair to Connor if they got back together, as Luke would probably break up with him for the same reasons again.

Luke suddenly feels like a massive jerk because while Connor and Luke have kept in touch since the break up and have talked almost everyday, it's always been Luke telling Connor his issues. Luke's never once asked how Connor felt about the breakup and he feels terrible.

"Thanks for watching out for me, Connie" Luke says, maybe it's the alcohol or maybe it's the part of Luke that misses being with Connor, but Luke doesn't know why he decided to use the old nickname "and for listening to me whine. I don't know why you would when I've been such a jerk to you."

"Oh, Luke" Connor says, sadly "do you really think you've been a jerk to me?"

"Well yeah, I broke up with you and never once asked how you feel about it. I just whined to you about my issues, I never asked if you had any of your own" Luke says.

"You had valid reasons to break up with me, Luke, and I respect and understand those. I would've felt horrible if we had been caught and you were outed because of me. I know how much you love hockey and how you don't want to do anything but play it professionally, even if you do well in every school subject and could have a career in any path. Everyone in the whole damn country knows you're not only bound to play professionally but will go first in the draft when you're eligible. And if that could've been ruined, because of me, then I'd never able to live with myself" Connor says.

"But it wouldn't be your fault if anything did happen, Con, I didn't have to date you, I did because I wanted to and because I liked you. If I had gotten outed it would've been my fault, not yours" Luke says.

"Yeah, maybe" Connor says "but that doesn't mean I wouldn't have blamed myself"

"But you shouldn't" Luke says.

"I know" Connor says "but I can't help it. And as for why I never talked to you about my issues. Well I didn't really have any and I would've told you if I did. I'm out and for the most part accepted and I know my sexuality isn't going to greatly affect my career. I don't have much to worry about, except maybe the fact that I still have feelings for you, but I wasn't gonna talk to you about that. You've got enough shit of your own to worry about, you don't need to worry about me. Plus telling you my feelings when you were so vulnerable would've probably guilted you into getting back together with me and I would've felt horrible for that. Besides, I know I'm the only one you can talk about this that truly understands, I have other people I can talk to about my issues who understand. So I'm not going to add more stress to your life if I don't have to"

They're at Connor's house before he finishes speaking, as Connor's house is in the same neighbourhood as Calum's, but neither of them bother to get out. Connor too busy pouring his feelings out to move and Luke too busy hanging onto Connor's everyword.

Luke's not sure if he ever loved Connor, sure kissing him felt nice and gave Luke those butterflies they all say you're supposed to get when you love someone. But now, when Connor's opened up to him like this and has all his walls down. And while how even though Connor is talking about his issues he still manages to be so selfless and show how much he cares about Luke.

Luke realizes,  _yeah,_  maybe he does love Connor.

Although maybe it's the alcohol talking, or maybe it's just the fact that Connor looks so pretty in moonlight and Luke can't help but be entranced by the way the pale blue light dances off his lips. Or the way his eyes shine brighter than the stars. Or maybe it's the fact Luke has had a craving to kiss someone again since he Connor broke up, but of course he never would as he knew how much of a risk it was.

But something, maybe a combination of all three, but something that Luke knows deep down isn't really love for Connor, or at least not it in the way Connor feels about Luke, something makes Luke kiss Connor.

And when Luke does, yeah he gets those butterflies and it feels pretty damn amazing but Luke still can't help but feel like it's missing something.

Luke doesn't have much time to find it though because Connor is pushing him off, gently of course.

"Luke, you're drunk and vulnerable and just- I never should've told you" Connor says and Luke comes out of his daze "I'm sor-"

"No, I'm sorry" Luke says "fuck, I'm so stupid and I-"

Luke starts pulling on his hair in agony but Connor stops him.

"Don't hurt yourself, or your perfect hair" Connor says making Luke smile slightly "and you're not stupid Luke. You're drunk and we do things without thinking when we're drunk and attraction is heightened when you're drunk. And I shouldn't have told you about my feelings for you, it just added another thing for you to be confused about. And you've got enough to worry about and shouldn't have to be questioning your feelings for me on top of that. We broke up for a reason and I should stop being such a kid and get over you already and I shouldn't have dragged you into my mess when you've got a big enough one your own. I'm sorry, Luke. I'm such an-"

"No" Luke says "don't call yourself names. I'm the one who asked you to tell me.  _I'm the one who_   _kissed you_. If anyone should be calling themselves names it's m-"

"How about we just accept we both made mistakes" Connor says "or else we're just going to keep arguing about how we did more wrong than the other"

"Yeah, okay" Luke says smiling at Connor, who returns it "that sounds good"

"Do you want me to take you back to your place" Connor asks and Luke shakes his head.

"No, my parents would be pissed if they knew I had so much to drink and besides I feel like I could fall asleep right now and it's a long way to my house" Luke says.

"Well good, because I would've driven you if you weren't comfortable staying at my place but it would take at least half an hour to get to your house, this is Toronto, after all" Connor says making Luke laugh "well c'mon let's go then".

Connor's family is asleep, so of course they have to be quiet when they get into his house. Luke has some Tylenol to help with the inevitable hangover he'll get in the morning before following Connor to his bedroom.

Almost as soon as they get in there Luke is rushing for the en suite bathroom and eliminating some of the alcohol he had into the toilet. Connor's hand rubbing circles on Luke's back as he does so helps to make the experience less painful.

Once Luke is finished Connor gives Luke a toothbrush, a new one of course, and some toothpaste and some mouthwash to get rid of the taste. Connor also gives Luke some extra pajamas, and even though they're kind of small on Luke, they're still more comfortable than the sweaty clothes he had on before and they don't reek of alcohol.

Once Luke is done getting dressed he goes back into Connor's room to find him setting up blankets on the floor.

"Go ahead and take my bed, I'll take the floor, you should be more comfortable" Connor says.

"No" Luke says " I can't take your bed and let you sleep on the floor, either I'm on the floor and you're in the bed or we're sharing"

"I didn't think you'd be comfortable sharing" Connor says.

"Well I'd be way more uncomfortable if I was in your bed and you were on the floor" Luke says "and to be honest I've never drank this much and while I feel pretty fine, I'm still kind of worried"

"Well c'mon then" Connor says gesturing towards his bed.

"Goodnight, Connor" Luke says once he's situated.

"Goodnight, Luke" Connor says turning off his light before wrapping his arms around Luke.

And they both non-verbally decide that Connor's arms around Luke's waist are just a comforting gesture from a friend, nothing more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally can't even describe how excited I am for this story. Lashton and junior hockey are two of my favourite things. Ofc I love NHL hockey too but junior hockey is just as great


	3. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashton and Luke both wake up to surprises

Ashton is nervous, to say the least.

It's about 5:30 am and he's wide awake, he woke probably around 4:45 and he hasn't been able to fall back asleep since then because he's been too anxious to.

In just over a day he's supposed to play his first exhibition game of the new season. And normally Ashton wouldn't be nervous to play hockey and in fact he'd be excited. That's if he was in Australia. But he's not in Australia.

He's in Canada. Canada, the country where almost everyone plays hockey and everyone is stronger, faster and better than him. Sure Ashton hasn't actually played a game in Canada yet but he can guess.

And while Ashton knows he's pretty good at hockey, that was while he was in Australia. Where all his opponents just played for fun and weren't actually very good at the sport. So it was easy for Ashton to score and get a lot of points and at least look like a good player. But Ashton knows he's no match, not here, where many of his opponents are bound to play in the NHL.

And just to make it even worse of course Luke fucking Hemmings has to be on his rival team and of course that's the first team Ashton is playing.

The media has been comparing Luke and Ashton since before Ashton even knew who Luke was. Ashton can kind of understand why they would've as they have similar points but Ashton knows that's only because he faces easier opponents than Luke does. If they're both in the same league there's no way Ashton would even come close to Luke.

And Ashton knows the media is going to be watching him like a hawk, even more so this season, and what will they say about him when he doesn't play as well as they expect like he knows he's going to? Will they call him a failure, a disappointment and other horrible names? Ashton doesn't think he can handle that.

And if that's not bad enough what if someone finds out about his little secret? Aka the fact he's not as straight as he claims to be. Sure Ashton likes girls and is attracted to them but he also likes guys. And what if one of his teammates find out and they're uncomfortable with having someone attracted to guys in the same dressing room as them? And they tell the whole team and somehow the media ends up finding out and there's goes Ashton's slim chance of ever playing hockey professionally.

And while Ashton knows he's lucky he at least like girls and doesn't have to pretend to like them Ashton would lying if he said he didn't want to date, or even kiss a boy, even just once. Although Ashton knows with his lifestyle it's way too risky. And it's hard when Ashton sees a cute guy and he has to restrain himself from flirting with him or even just looking at him and making it obvious he was just checking out a dude. And it's even harder when Ashton is at parties and he sees two guys making out without a care in the world and feels the deep longing to be that carefree in the pit of his stomach.

However despite the fact Ashton is nervous about playing hockey he has to admit Canada is pretty nice country, excluding the weather of course. Everyone just seems more welcoming and overall friendlier in Canada. And despite not even have having a full practice with his whole team yet Ashton still kind of feels like he's part of the team.

This boy with an affinity for hair dye named Michael came and greeted Ashton and his family at the airport when they first arrived in Toronto and took them on a tour of the city and then to their house. That was about a month ago and Ashton has seen Michael pretty much everyday since then. Michael has introduced Ashton to most of his teammates and they've practiced their skills in their arena a couple of times. And while Ashton has been pretty good during their 'practices', he's only up against a couple other people and Ashton figures they're going easy on him.

Ashton is snapped out of his thoughts by his phone buzzing alerting him of a text which he knows is most likely from Michael, and Ashton groans and rolls over to grab his phone off the nightstand.

Ashton winces as the brightness of the screen is the first thing he's seen this morning and squints his eyes as he unlocks his phone and reads the text.

_You ready?_

_-Michael_

At first Ashton is confused as to what Michael is referring to and then it hits him.

Ashton has practice today.

How could he have forgotten? What if Michael had never texted him? Or what if he was asleep and missed Michael's text and when he didn't respond he figured he'd just leave without Ashton? What if Ashton missed the first practice of the season? What kind of impression would that leave on his coach? Not a good one, Ashton knows.

Ashton's only met his coach a couple times but he can already tell he's pretty strict and takes no bullshit.

Ashton then realizes he hasn't texted Michael back yet and he could still leave if he thinks Ashton won't respond. Although Ashton can tell Michael's not really the type to do that and he seems pretty nice from the short time Ashton's known him.

Although Ashton has never really done anything to test the pale boy's patience and Ashton figures he probably shouldn't so he quickly texts Michael back.

**_Shit, I almost forgot I'm so sorry! I'll be down soon!_ **

**_-Ash_ **

Ashton figures he should just honest because it's not good to start friendships off lying, even if it's just a small one.

_We planned that I was going to pick you up two days ago. How could you forget? I'm very offended :P_

_-Michael_

Michael's being sarcastic so Ashton figures he's not too upset over the matter.

**_Sorry I've just got a lot on my mind_ **   
**_-Ash_ **

_Oh, well don't strain yourself then :P And you're lucky you have the most amazing person to ever grace this earth (me) to save your ass when you forget about important events. Where is my thank you?_

_-Michael_

**_Well I was going to thank you until you were rude to me_ **

**_-Ash_ **

_Well if you're offended by that you're gonna have a lot of trouble holding in your tears when the coach yells at you if we're_   
_late. So stop wasting time and hurry the fuck up, I'm not getting in shit bc of you_

_-Michael_

_**Okay, okay I'll be there in five minutes.** _   
_**-Ash** _

Once Ashton sends the text the quickly scrambles to get ready knowing Michael won't hesitate to leave without him. Ashton quickly brushes his teeth and gets dressed before grabbing his hockey bag and stick, grateful for the fact he hasn't unpacked his hockey bag since he arrived in Canada. Ashton quickly grabs a granola bar and one of his sister Lauren's Arizona teas from the fridge. Even though Ashton knows Lauren will kill him for touching her drink and he doesn't even really like tea that much there's no time to make coffee and Ashton needs caffeine somehow.

He runs out of the house and quickly locks the door. He sees Michael in the car watching Ashton scramble with an amused smirk on his face but as Ashton catches his eye Michael looks down and acts like he was on his phone the whole time.  _That jerk_ , Ashton thinks to himself.

At least Michael had the decency to pop his trunk open and Ashton throws his stick and bag in the trunk before hopping in the passengers seat.

"Thanks for your help" Ashton grumbles as he shuts the door.

"I reminded you of practice and waited for you, that's as far as my help extends for today" Michael quips taking a sip of a Tim Horton's coffee.

"You didn't get me one?" Ashton asks incredulously.

"We're not  _that_  close yet, and besides I didn't have enough money to" Michael says as he munches on a bagel.

"But you had enough to get a bagel" Ashton quips.

"Hey I gotta have my breakfast too you know. The bible even says you have to take care of yourself before you can take care of others." Michael quips.

"And you spend all your free time reading the bible?" Ashton retorts.

"No, but my grandma is very religious and I'm not just going to ignore an old woman, who do you think I am?" Michael asks.

Ashton opens his mouth to say something but Michael stops him.

"Don't answer that" Michael quips turning on his ignition.

"I was wondering if you were actually going to start driving" Ashton retorts.

"Shut the fuck up, Irwin. This is all your fault for distracting me" Michael grumbles pulling out of Ashton's driveway.

"Well I do have that kind of affect on people" Ashton retorts.

"In your dreams" Michael scoffs.

\---  
Michael takes a back way that avoids all the traffic and they actually make it to the arena with time to spare, even though they're still the last ones there.

"I expected more from you, Irwin" the coach, coach Bolton, sighs as Ashton and Michael walk in.

"Sorry sir, it won't happen again" Ashton says.

"Damn right it won't, now hurry up, if you play well maybe you can make it up to me" coach Bolton says.

"It won't sir, again I'm really sorry" Ashton says before walking to the locker room, Michael right behind him.

"But we weren't even late" Ashton whispers to Michael once they're out of earshot.

"Coach doesn't care about that, we were the last ones so we might as well have been" Michael says.

"So whoever shows up last is automatically late? That stupid" Ashton mutters.

"Not necessarily, no" Michael says "But you have to show up within fifteen minutes of the second last people arriving. And I know it's stupid but it's the coach's rule and you don't want to argue with him"

"I can tell" Ashton retorts causing Michael to snort as he pushes the door to the locker room open.

Ashton feels the anxiety of meeting the coach's expectations bubble in his stomach as he steps in the locker room and sees his other teammates, which of course are almost all bigger or stronger than him. And it's it not even like Ashton's scrawny or anything, but he might as well be compared to them. And while sure they're his teammates Ashton knows all his opponents will be just like them, or even bigger.

"Hey, Ashton!" A boy named Mike, not to be confused with Michael, greets.

While it's not hard to confuse the two by looks as Mike is dark-skinned and Michael is paler than a ghost, Ashton still sometimes ends up calling Mike, Michael and having Michael respond when he wanted Mike to or vice versa. Although Ashton figures he's not alone on that boat.

"Oh hey Mike!" Ashton says mentally high-fiving himself for getting his name right.

"I heard coach yelling at you and don't worry about it, man. He can just be kind of dramatic and we all know you're going to be awesome out there, he's going to forget all about you ever being 'late'" Mike says putting quotes around the word late.

He's saying it to be nice and reassure Ashton and Ashton should feel reassured but he can only add Mike to the long list of people who are expecting him to do as well in Canada as he did in Australia and that he'll end up disappointing when he doesn't accomplish that.

"And what if I'm not" Ashton thinks to himself but then realizes he must've said it out loud as everyone stops to look at him.

 _Great_ , Ashton thinks sarcastically, actually to himself this time. He was just supposed to smile politely at Mike and say 'thank you' and that would've been the end of the conversation. Why couldn't he have done that? Why did his mouth have to betray him like that?

"What if you're not what? Good at hockey? Don't be ridiculous, we all know you are" Mike says.

"Yeah but that was in Australia. I mean, just look at you guys" Ashton says gesturing around the room "and I'm gonna be up against guys who are even stronger and faster than you. Like maybe I am good in Australia, but that's only because I had easier opponents there. I mean, I just moved here a month ago, I'm still not used to living here, let alone playing hockey. And I only have this practice before our first game tomorrow and it's against The Sharks and they have fucking Luke Hemmings on their team, and one of the best goalies. I don't know, I'm not going to do well like you all think."

"No one expects you to do amazing in your first few games, Ashton, at least not the people who matter. And tomorrow's just an exhibition game, it doesn't matter anyways. But once you're comfortable with us I'm sure you'll do amazing and Hemmings is going to have to take a run for his money. And I'm sure you'll be more than comfortable by the end of the exhibition games. And it's good to get the toughest team over with first, all the others will seem easy in comparison" Michael says.

"Yeah, I guess so, but the coach said I have to hurry and I don't want to piss him off anymore" Ashton says effectively ending the conversation.

The anxiety doesn't leave however when the conversation ends and in fact it only gets worse. And Ashton is practically shaking by the time he steps out onto the ice and is too busy with his thoughts as the coach explains how they're starting with drills and are going to finish the practice with a quick scrimmage game.

Ashton feels his name being called sometime around there but he wasn't paying attention so he doesn't know what the coach said about him. Luckily for Ashton Michael noticed his confusion and whispers to him that Ashton was supposed to be one of the captains of the scrimmage teams. Which only adds to Ashton's anxiety.

\---  
When Luke wakes up he instantly shields his eyes from the ray of sunlight streaming in through the window, which is pretty much equivalent to staring into a solar eclipse due to Luke's hangover.

Luke doesn't remember why he ever thought it was a good a idea to have so much to drink last night, in fact there's a lot from the previous night he doesn't remember.

So needless to say Luke is pretty surprised when he wakes up to find he's not in his room. Luke doesn't have to look around long to recognize the room having been in it many times before and when Luke does realize panic floods his stomach.

 _Why the fuck is he in Connor's room?_  They didn't hook up last night, did they?

Luke figures they probably didn't as Luke knows Connor wouldn't've taken advantage of him when he was drunk like that, especially not their first time. And while Luke doesn't know much about sex considering the furthest he and Connor went was making out, Luke knows enough about it to know he'd probably be more sore if that activity did take place.

So why is he in Connor's room? Did he drive Luke home? If so why didn't he take Luke back to his place? Does Calum know? Does anyone know? Did anyone see Luke leave with Connor? If so did they think anything suspicious of it?

There are millions of questions flooding Luke's mind but the most important one perhaps is  _where the fuck is Connor?_

Is Luke going to have sneak out of his ex's home on his own? What if he gets caught and Connor's parents think they hooked up? Why aren't you taught how to successfully complete the walk of shame? Even though Luke knows this technically isn't the walk of shame it might as well be.

And if Luke does manage to sneak out without getting caught where is he supposed to go? How will he get home? His car is most likely still at Calum's unless someone brought it to Connor's or back to his house. Plus Luke only has his g1 so he'd have to have someone in the car with him. And Luke isn't even sure how safe it is be driving when he's this hungover.

Sure Luke isn't drunk anymore but he still drank way more than he ever has and probably shouldn't drive for at least 24 hours after just to be safe.

So will Luke just have to walk to Calum's and hope he can get a ride from his sister or something? If that's the case Luke should hurry and get to Calum's because he doesn't know what time it but he knows he has practice at one and should get home and shower and eat to at least not look hungover before he gets there.

Luke looks over at the clock on Connor's nightstand and it reads 9:30am, and okay yeah, Luke really needs to hurry as it takes about half an hour to forty five minutes to walk to Calum's.

Luke grabs his phone off Connor's nightstand, before getting out of his bed, too quickly as he starts to feel dizzy.

Once Luke has regained his composure he's about to just leave and text Connor telling him to bring anything he left there later when Luke realizes his attire. Instead of just keeping his clothes on from the night before he must've have borrowed some of Connor's pyjamas.

 _Shit, shit, shit_  Luke thinks to himself.

What is Luke supposed to do now? He can't be seen wearing pyjamas made for a boy smaller than him, he'll be fucked if he does. He might as well be wearing a sign reading 'I just hooked up with a boy'. Even though Luke knows they didn't actually hook up that's what it looks like.

Luke then notices Connor's dirty clothes hamper and he opens it hoping that Connor just decided to put his clothes in there but Luke's heart falls when he realizes the bin is empty.

Luke decides to check the en-suite bathroom for his clothes but of course with Luke's luck they aren't in there either.

Luke decides 'fuck it' since he has no time to waste and is about to leave and as he exits Connor's room he runs into someone, well something rather as the person's holding something.

"Luke!" Connor says surprised, worriedly watching Luke clutch his stomach as it hurts from having rammed it into the laundry bin Connor is holding "you're up!"

And Luke only nods, because what else is he supposed to say? Luke woke up in his ex's bed and now he just ran into him. And to make it even worse Connor's greeting him normally as if he's not surprised Luke is still there.  _What the fuck happened last night?_

"Do you not remember what happened?" Connor asks and he must've noticed Luke's confusion.

"No" Luke admits "what happened?"

"Not much" Connor says and Luke can tell he's lying "what's the last thing you remember"

"Playing cards" Luke answers " but the last major thing I remember was Jackson leaving"

"Well you started drinking a lot after he left and I was getting worried so I brought you back here" Connor says.

"Does Calum know? Did anyone see us?" Luke asks.

"No, no one saw us, we snuck out the back and I just texted Calum with your phone saying you got a ride home and Grant too" Connor says.

"Oh, well thank you" Luke says "but why didn't you actually take me home, like to my place?"

"You said you didn't want to because your parents would be pissed if you came home that drunk" Connor answers.

"Oh" Luke says "and that's all that happened"

"Pretty much, yeah" Connor says and Luke can tell he's hiding something.

"Why did I wake up in your bed and not on the floor?" Luke asks.

"Because I wanted you to have my bed" Connor says and again Luke can tell Connor isn't telling him everything.

"And I didn't argue?" Luke asks.

"Not really" Connor says.

"Well sorry for being such an asshole when I'm drunk" Luke says making Connor chuckle.

"You weren't, really, Luke" Connor says.

"Well that's good to know" Luke retorts.

"I have your clothes by the way, I washed them so they wouldn't smell like alcohol" Connor says holding the basket up and Luke sees his blue flannel and black skinny jeans on the top of it.

"Oh, well thank you" Luke says surprised Connor would have the decency do that.

Sure Luke knows Connor is a nice person and all, Luke wouldn't have dated him if he wasn't and they definitely wouldn't've continued to be friends. But still taking care of your drunk ex and washing their clothes for them, even if you're still friends with them, isn't something most people would do. And they certainly wouldn't let them sleep in their bed.

"So where's your family?" Luke asks.

"They already left" Connor answers "but get dressed, we can get Tim's on the way to your house, since it'd be fastest. You have practice today, right?"

"Yeah at one" Luke answers grabbing his clothes from the basket "and that sounds good but what about my car? How am I gonna get it back to my place?"

"Maybe Calum's sister could bring it or something?" Connor suggests.

"Yeah, okay, I should've thought of that. I'll ask her" Luke says.

And as Luke is getting dressed in Connor's bathroom he has vague memories of getting dressed in there the night before but he decides not to mention to Connor the fact that his memories are coming back.

Not until they're back fully because Luke doesn't know whether or not there are things that happened that would make it better off for him to just pretend like his memories of that night never came back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ashton is in this chapter so yay! Sadly no lashton yet but they'll meet either in the next chapter or the chapter after that.


	4. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both Luke and Ashton have practice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So to help you picture everything better the team Luke plays for is based off the San Jose Sharks in terms of their name and jerseys and Ashton's is based off the LA Kings so hopefully that helps, if you don't know what the teams look like just look it up and it should help. They're two of my favorite teams (no.1 is the Pittsburgh Penguins tho) and they're actually rivals so I was like 'hey'. And yeah Ashton's coach is Troy's dad from HSM, I was feeling a lil unoriginal at the time and Luke's is Alaric from TVD.

The whistle blows for the final time signaling the end of practice and Ashton sighs in relief.

Of course he enjoyed the practice but between having to make it up to the coach for being 'late' and trying to live up to the expectations of everyone practice was pretty damn hard and Ashton worked way harder in this practice than he has in any other one. The fact he was up at 5am for this practice didn't really help with the matters.

Ashton is slowly skating off the ice and he must be lost in his thoughts because when someone grabs his shoulder it startles Ashton and he jumps.

"Didn't meant to scare you" the voice says and Ashton recognizes it as the voice of Scott McCall, an olive skinned boy with dark hair and equally as dark eyes "but coach has been calling you for the past minute, didn't you hear?"

"I guess not, sometimes I get a little lost up here" Ashton says pointing to his head.

"I guess so" Scott laughs before leaning into whisper in Ashton's ear "I just wanted to let you know you did awesome today and I think you blew coach away and he forgave you for being 'late', but shit, he's so irrational he won't hesitate to get mad again if you don't see what he wants"

"Well thanks for the heads up" Ashton says genuinely.

"No problem, that's what friends are for, now you should go, he'll only get madder by the second" Scott says squeezing Ashton's shoulder before skating off.

Ashton skates over to where the coach is standing with both Michael and Mike near him helping clean up.

"It took you long enough, do you need to get your hearing checked or do you think you're enough of a bigshot that you don't need to listen to me?" Coach Bolton says and Michael and Mike give Ashton looks that say 'shit' or 'good luck'.

"No sir, it's not like that at all I just zoned out and didn't hear you I'm sorry" Ashton says.

"Well I can accept that this time, but  _only_  this time, don't let it happen again, especially during a game" Coach Bolton says.

"I won't, I promise sir, and again I'm really sorry" Ashton says.

"You know you showed exceptional talent today and I found myself thinking maybe this guy could lead my team one day. However, that all went out the door when you started skating off right after the whistle blew and didn't even think about asking if I needed help cleaning up-" Coach Bolton starts but Ashton cuts him off.

And that was a really bad idea but Ashton couldn't help it, he can't just allow people to make wrong assumptions about him and he'll often defend himself without thinking when they do. Plus his old coach was so easy going and actually let players defend themselves so Ashton figures he's accustomed to it.

"You will not interrupt me, talk back to me or make excuses for you careless behaviour" Coach Bolton says in a tone that makes Ashton a little uneasy "now as I was saying, being captain is about more than just talent, it's about leadership and setting good examples for the team to follow by, which clearly you have not done. I'll let you off this time if you help finish cleaning up but just know you could score ten goals a game but you're never going to be captain if you think you can just come in here and showoff and display no responsibility or leadership. Are we clear?"

"Yes sir" Ashton says before helping Michael and Mike round up loose pucks.

And if Ashton didn't think living up to the expectations of the whole hockey world was too much pressure alone his coach's pressure sure makes it that way.

\---

"Damn, what happened to you?" is the first thing Calum says as Luke hops into Calum's sister, Mali's car.

She already dropped Luke's car off at his house, with the help of her boyfriend, earlier that morning and she offered to give Luke a ride to practice, even though his house is way out of the way as it's in the opposite direction of the arena and Luke is grateful for that. Luke figured he shouldn't drive with his hangover and he wouldn't have been able to have gotten a ride with his parents or brothers since they all left earlier for work. Besides Luke doesn't have his full license and still needs a registered driver in the car with him at all times.

Mali is truly a saint and Luke doesn't know what he'd do without her.

For some reason Calum is in the back instead of shotgun, Luke figures it had something to do with Mali kicking him out of the front and sending him there for messing with the radio or air conditioning or something. On any other day Luke would take shotgun since it's such a rare opportunity but well there's a little less sunlight in the back and Luke needs to avoid the sun as much as possible right now.

"Calum!" Mali exclaims "Don't be rude!"

"What, it's just  _Luke_ , he doesn't mind, mild abuse is how I show my love" Calum says and Mali mutters something about boys under her breath.

"So really, what happened to you last night?" Calum asks as Luke puts his seatbelt on.

"Maybe you'd know if you didn't ditch me last night" Luke says.

Luke knows it was kind of a low thing to say, Calum is allowed to have fun with a girl if he wants, he doesn't have to babysit Luke. It's just their relationship has been kind of rocky lately, Luke knows it's his fault for keeping secrets but he also kind of wishes that Calum would clue in and figure out there's a reason Luke's keeping things from him and be respectful of that. Now Calum is ditching Luke to hang out with others and Luke figures it's only a matter of time before Luke loses his best friend. And Luke can't lose Calum, not only would that make playing on the same team pretty awkward but Calum has been Luke's best friend since he started playing hockey when he was three. Luke doesn't remember a life without Calum and he doesn't want to know one.

"Well  _sorry_  for wanting to hang out with a beautiful girl instead of my 'best friend' who's keeping secrets from me" Calum says.

And Luke knows he kind of deserved it but it still hurt, especially when Calum put quotes around the word 'best friend'.

"Hey, hey, I will not have any of this in my car" Mali says like a stern mother "apologize, both of you".

Calum starts to protest but Mali gives him a stern look and he sighs.

"Fine, I'm sorry" Calum says although it's not very genuine.

"I'm sorry too, you have every right to have a girlfriend or fling or whatever you want and I shouldn't get jealous when you pay attention to someone that isn't me. And I also shouldn't be keeping secrets from you but if there's wasn't a valid reason for me to be keeping things from you I wouldn't be. I hope you can understand" Luke says.

"Luke, your apology was awesome, Calum on the other hand? Yours was so unoriginal not to mention not at all genuine, apologize for real this time, this is Luke not some random guy you accidentally checked too hard in a game" Mali scolds.

"Okay, okay" Calum says "first off, I forgive you, Luke, if you really have reasons to keep things from me then I should actually act like a best friend and respect that. Secondly, I'm sorry for completely ditching you last night, I was planning on seeing you at some point, honestly, but then I kind of got caught up in Ashley and couldn't leave if you know what I mean"

Luke knows exactly what Calum means and he groans along with Mali.

"Okay you're my little brother I do  _not_ need to know these things" Mali says and Calum only smirks.

"I'll forgive if you don't tell me anymore details of your sex life ever again" Luke says.

"Well I can't promise that" Calum says which again makes Luke and Mali groan.

"Seriously though Luke, no offence, but you look like shit, how much did you have to drink last night?" Calum asks.

"I don't know, a lot" Luke says "more than enough to get drunk"

"Luuke" Calums drawls "that's not good, didn't you feel weird?"

"Yeah but I just thought it was anxiety" Luke answers.

"How did you get home, what did your parents say?" Calum asks.

"I um- got a ride from Jack and my parents were more worried than mad" Luke says and he's lying but Calum seems to buy it, or maybe he doesn't but this is his way of starting to respect the fact there are some aspects of his life Luke can't tell him about.

Of course Luke really got a ride from Connor and when he did get home in the morning all his family had already left. And there was a note on the counter from his mum telling him she wasn't worried as she figured he stayed at Calum's and that there was leftover pancake mix in the fridge he could use. Luke just opted for cereal however though because even if he thought he could keep the pancakes down he still would've had to put the pancakes on the griddle and he didn't really feel like doing that. He just wanted something quick and then to pass out again and get a few minutes of sleep before practice.

Luke's seriously regretting that now as he's starving and knows he'll probably have to wait until after practice to get something. And of course thinking about food makes Luke's stomach grumble and it must've been pretty loud because the next thing Luke knows Mali is asking about it.

"Have you eaten?" she asks.

"Just a bit of cereal" Luke answers.

"Well you can't go to practice on a practically empty stomach" Mali says "let me get you something, we can stop at Tim's and you can eat it on the way, we have time. Plus you look like you could use some caffeine anyways"

"Well if you don't mind that would be nice, but I can pay for it" Luke says.

"Nah, you're practically my brother anyways, don't worry about it" Mali says.

So they pull into the next Tim Horton's and Luke orders a turkey club sandwich with a double double and of course a sandwich is just a sandwich and you can't really do anything special to it, but it might as well have been crafted by the gods themselves due to how hungry Luke is.

Luke finishes a few minutes before they reach the arena and as it comes into view suddenly Luke is excited again at the prospect of the new season and the car has barely come to a stop before he's jumping out.

"Be careful" Mali says, again acting like a mother.

"I was wondering when your excitement would come" Calum laughs getting out after Luke.

"Well I just hope we're both captains for scrimmage so I can beat you like always" Luke says.

"In your dreams, Hemmings" Calum says "now I'll race you there."

"And what will I get when I win like always?" Luke asks.

"The blessing of my wonderful friendship" Calum says and Luke shakes his head.

"But I already have that" Luke says.

"Yeah and you don't appreciate it, so you need to learn to" Calum says and Luke rolls his eyes "by the way the race starts now".

"Hey-what, that's not fair" Luke protests running after Calum.

" _Life_  isn't fair Luke" Calum says making Luke chuckle.

And yeah Luke really doesn't know how he could live without Calum.

\---

"Don't let coach get to you, he can kind of be a dick sometimes" Michael says taking a bite of his meatball sub.

They just got out of practice and even though it's a little early for lunch they're both starving so Michael suggested they go to Subway and Ashton wasn't going to protest. Who says no to Subway, especially when you're starving?

"I can tell" Ashton says making Michael laugh.

"But really he's a good coach besides the fact he's a little strict. He takes no one's shit and treats us equally and doesn't favour any players which is nice and he's not afraid to tell us how much we suck if we're slacking. Which of course always motivates us to play better, he'll grow on you. Plus off the ice he's a pretty cool dude. He has a party at the end of every season at his mansion and it's not like some lame old person party like there's alcohol and everything and he always tells us stories from when he played in the NHL and they're pretty interesting. And he's pretty funny if you get him drunk" Michael says.

"Well I'll look forward to that" Ashton says.

"You were amazing today though, you even surprised coach and that never happens. I can't wait to see you play against the Sharks tomorrow maybe Hemmings will finally learn he's got competition and maybe isn't the best player after all" Michael says.

"Does he think that?" Ashton asks "Like is he arrogant?"

Ashton figures maybe if he has a valid reason to hate Luke Hemmings it'll make being rival more easy, because to be honest right now Ashton isn't really into this whole competition aspect of it. He just wants to prove to himself that he can play just as well in Canada as he did in Australia. He doesn't want to be pitted against some random kid that might not also want a rivalry just because they're both good and on rival teams.

"Hemmings? Nah not at all, I mean I don't really know him but I've never gotten that vibe from him. Like he never gets into fights and rarely gets penalties but he's so damn fast. Like one second you'll have the puck and everything is fine and then he comes by in a blur of teal and black and scores, it's annoying. Plus even though Hemmings is fine personality wise, that doesn't mean the Sharks don't have any assholes on their team because they do. Like Jackson Whittemore, man he's the douchiest kid I've ever met. Plus he' so overprotective of Hemmings it's insane, like he'll go after anyone who even does so much as steal the puck from him. Like I know it's your job as the enforcer to protect the most targeted players but damn he needs to chill a bit. He almost broke my nose last year just because I stole a puck from Hemmings and he didn't even apologize. So yeah watch out for him, he'll probably go after you" Michael rambles.

"Wow that really makes me less nervous" Ashton says sarcastically.

"Well of course me and the other guys will try and make sure that doesn't happen" Michael says "so anyways wanna come over to my house and play NHL 15 after this, it'll help you get even more prepared for tomorrow".

"Oh yes, because simulator games are so much like actually playing" Ashton says.

"Hey, don't knock it til you try it, besides it's just fun anyways, not everything has to be about winning. Jeez, just be a normal teenager and play video games with me" Michael says.

"But I never get the chance to be a normal teenager with the whole world watching me" Ashton says.

"Don't flatter yourself, it's not the whole world, tons of countries don't really watch hockey let alone junior hockey. I'm sure there's a ton of people who have no clue who you are. And you say never get to be normal but now I'm giving you a chance to be normal, you'd be an idiot to turn it down" Michael says.

"Fine, I guess I'll play" Ashton sighs.

"Good, now I can finally beat you at something!" Michael exclaims.

"Is that the only reason you want to play" Ashton asks.

"I'll let you figure that out" Michael says.

Michael sure is something, but he's kind of growing on Ashton and he thinks they'll be quite good friends.

\---

"I am going to die" Luke whispers to Calum.

They just started practice and are doing drills and the brightly light arena is too much for Luke's eyes to handle. He had to take of his sunglasses so his coach wouldn't suspect anything, leaving his naked eyes exposed to the light. He's tried to keep the squinting to a minimum as well to also not make it obvious he has a massive hangover, but well, that's easier said than done and it's only a matter of time before the coach figures what's up.

"Maybe I'll actually beat you in scrimmage then, not that I couldn't anyways, but I mean like  _really_ beat you" Calum says.

"Caalum" Luke whines "this isn't funny my eyes feel like I'm looking into a solar eclipse, my head feels like Thor is bashing on it with his hammer and I want nothing more than to just collapse on the ice where it's nice and cold"

"Those are some interesting similes you used there" Calum smirks which only makes Luke whine further.

"Calum, help me!" Luke exclaims.

"What do you expect me to do, you're the one who drank so irresponsibly last night, now you've got to pay the price like the rest of us" Calum says.

"Do you know how many times I've had to pick up your drunk ass up off the floor, and cleaned up your vomit and had to stay the night at your house to make sure you were okay and had to sleep on the floor instead of in the bed because I didn't wanna get puked on. And had to change your puke-stained sheets for you and clean up your trashed house before your parents got home so they wouldn't yell at you. All I'm asking, for once, once, is for you to help me as little payback for all I have done for you" Luke says.

"Wow, okay, you really know how to make me feel guilty. And I'd love to help but what can I do, we're in the middle of practice. What do you expect me to do, ask coach if he can shut off all the lights and let you sleep on the ice until your hangover's gone?" Calum asks.

"That actually sounds really nice, don't give me false hope" Luke retorts and Calum rolls his eyes.

"I don't know, just ask coach if you can wear sunglasses, I think it's pretty obvious you're hungover anyways and he  _knows_  the party was last night. Plus everyone here is a little hungover, you're just the worst and most obvious" Calum says.

"Aww thank you, you're too sweet, you always know how to make me feel better" Luke retorts.

"I'm just telling it like it is, also I have some Tylenol and water in my bag, take some of that. Just don't let anyone else know I have it, or they'll all flock to it like vultures. This stupid team, I can't even keep my drugs safe!" Calum grumbles.

"You know that makes it sound like you're talking about crack or something" Luke says.

"That's why I said it, now go, my turn's soon and you're starting to annoy me" Calum says.

Of course Luke knows he's only joking though.

Luke skates up to his coach, Coach Saltzman, who is a younger man with dark hair and eyes and is usually pretty easy going and Luke has yet to see anyone really anger him, except for Jackson of course. So Luke is kind of a little nervous to disappoint his coach as he doesn't know how he'll react and Luke knows his coach thinks he's is one of the more responsible players and he usually is so of course that makes coming to his coach about this even harder.

So Luke doesn't really know how to ask and he's lucky he doesn't have to because his coach already knows what's up.

"Let me guess, you wanna get sunglasses, go ahead, and if you start feeling dizzy or anything by all means tell me. I think you can afford to sit out for a practice if you need to" Coach Saltzman says.

"You're not mad?" Luke asks.

"Of course not, you're not the only hungover one here, I know the party was last night. Besides it's nice to see you act like a normal kid, do you know how long I've been waiting for the day Luke Hemmings shows up to one of my practices massively hungover? As long as you don't show up to games like this I don't care, have all the fun you want while you still can" Coach Saltzman says.

"Okay, thank you, thank you" Luke says.

"It's no problem" Coach Saltzman says "also take this, it'll work better than pills".

He takes out a small bottle from his jacket and Luke sees that it's one of those hangover recovery shot things. At first Luke thinks it's kind of strange his coach would just have those in his jacket, but then he remembers there's people like Jackson on the team and he probably has a full stock of them for whenever players show up drunk.

Luke thanks his coach again before going to get his sunglasses and when he comes back on the ice of course he gets teased about it and his teammates make jokes about him 'losing his innocence'.

And sure Luke's teammates may be idiots but he loves them and wouldn't want them anyway else and can't wait to play his next season with them.


End file.
